I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
well you can't waste a boner
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
