What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Randomize
