There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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