her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize