the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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