i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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