perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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