WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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