There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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