Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
