Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize