Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
