R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
