Don't you send me to vm
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
