Taylor Swift is so right about you.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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