Sober January is a disaster.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
