Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
