Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Randomize
