? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Even the bartender felt bad for me
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
