just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
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