got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
