my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
