What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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