i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
