we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize