just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize