You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
they call him Oral-B. enough said
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
