Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
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