Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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