Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
