i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
