Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
