i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
