dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
