But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Randomize
