No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
