dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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