Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
