Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
