At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
