i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I could fuck to npr.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
