Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
