no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
