I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
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