consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
