Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
