there's paper in my vomit.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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