haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize