When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
There's always time for handjobs
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
