BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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